cheerfire | would someone care to classify

would someone care to classify

[ This was stupid. Scratch that, this was something more than stupid. It was pointless, hopeless, insane, a waste of time-- the list went on. But after everything he had seen after the Upside Down, why should this be any more fantastical than the rest of it? It doesn't take long from when he's out of the hospital that the research begins. They're out of the trailer park now, officially condemned, but his uncle had been given enough hush money to set them up at a new place, an apartment just outside of town. Even though Eddie has been officially been cleared of all wrong doing, it was still better for him to keep a low profile.

As soon as they were settled in the new place, Eddie had shut himself away in his new room with the decrepit books he had scrounged up in the library. They were all about death, the dead, the afterlife-- and how to make contact. Call him crazy-- and most people probably would, if they had known what he was up to. But Eddie had shut out the rest of the world as he healed, threw himself into macabre studies as his body healed. The only thing he's been able to think about since leaving the hospital, since that night, really, is her. Chrissy Cunningham. And he has been consumed by the idea of somehow contacting her, apologizing for how he's failed her. It's the least he can do, right?

And so it's late one early spring night that Eddie slips from the apartment, fires up the van and makes a beeline for the old trailer. A brown paper grocery bag sits beside him on the passenger seat, his only companion on the silent drive over. The move is bright and heavy in the sky as he pulls up in front of the trailer, still wrapped up in caution tape. Not that the feds have done much about it, and so he's able to sneak inside without much issue. Every single nerve ending feels like it's on fire, and it's all he can do to keep from trembling. He hasn't been in the trailer since it happened, and it feels deeply wrong to be here now.

For once, determination wins out over fear and anxiety, and Eddie goes about unpacking the bag and spreading the contents out over the living room floor. He spreads out candles, bundled sage, grave dirt, a wilted lily. All of them are arranged carefully, the candles lit, as he flips slowly through pages of a heavy, musty, tome. There's no way this will work, he thinks, but trying might make him feel better. Maybe he can move on after that. Cast in the glow of candlelight, Eddie fumbles through several lines of latin, words that he only vaguely knows the meaning of. Then he sets the book down, closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. ]

Chrissy Cunningham. [ It's the first time he's spoken her name aloud since... since then. And it sends spears of guilt that drive themselves deep into his heart. ] I call upon-- [ This is so stupid, he thinks. Pathetic. ] I call upon your spirit. Reveal yourself.

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[He'll keep her safe. Eddie is always going to keep her safe. He's promised. That's enough to make her smile a little, nodding as he asks her to tend to his hair. She doesn't even stop to think it might be a distraction, Chrissy so focused on trying to find a way to take care of him in return. He's done so much for her, the least she can do is wash his hair.

She quickly contents herself with working his shampoo through his hair, rising up on her tiptoes to make sure she reaches every single inch a few times over. His playful tone has put her in a slightly lighter state of mind, and she hums one of her old favorite pop songs as she works. Every so often her soapy hand will reach down to grab hold of his arm, almost as if she's afraid she might slip away if she isn't tethered to him near constantly.]

Eddie? [Her voice is soft as she guides him to start rinsing his hair, and works her sudsy hands over his body to scrub him clean. She seems to be completely oblivious to the fact he's naked and her hands are all over his body.]

You're sure there's no way I'll be pulled back to where I was before, right?

[ Eddie is just beginning to relax, to enjoy the feeling of her fingers in his hair when she asks that. The question makes his guts turn to the ice, makes his blood go cold even under the warm spray of water. It's because he doesn't know the answer, but knows what he wants the answer to be. He's promised to keep her safe, and he'll do anything to make that happen, but he can't promise her what she needs to hear the most. As much as he wants to make that promise, to tell her what she needs to hear, he can't promise something he doesn't know to be true. ]

I... I really don't know.

[ He turns towards her, his face solemn, as he goes again to wrap his arms around her. Was this all a mistake? Has bringing her back caused more harm to her than good? In the moment he feels so stupidly selfish. Maybe he should have let her rest in peace, where she wouldn't have to worry about such things. ]

If this-- if this is too much. [ He pulls her tighter then, feels like he's the one about to start crying. Which again sends the shame that ties itself to selfishness flooding through him. ] Then I'm sorry. I know this is... so much. And you're here now because of me. [ Dead because of him, too. ] I don't want you to be afraid.

No, it's not too much. And I'm not afraid.

[She reassures him, even as she's not really able to put into words how she's feeling. It's a complicated matter, but above everything else, she's just glad to be here with him. So she kisses him, slow and sweet, trying to show him how she feels since words seem to be failing her right now.]

I just don't want to get to have you for real, and then lose you all over again.

[And she knows that he feels the same way, that he'd do whatever it took to keep her there with him.

As he finishes rinsing off, she makes sure that she's the one to turn off the water. She wants him to see that she's capable of doing small things, that there's parts of her that are still normal. She just has to come back into her own, is all.

He steps out first and grabs the towels, and wraps up in his own before he bundles her up in the other. They dry off and she watches him get dressed, before letting him help her into the clothes he's picked out for her. The oversized fit makes her giggle and grin, and she seems a little more like herself despite the clothes being so out of place from her usual style.

She isn't sure which of them kiss the other while they're in the middle of getting dressed and ready to head out of the bathroom. All that she knows is that he lifts her to rest on the edge of the bathroom counter, and she greedily pulls him in to stand between her legs as she takes her time enjoying deeper and far more languid kisses.

Her hands rest on his shoulders, and when she's had her fill her mouth parts from his, but her hands in his hair guide him to rest her forehead against his. It's perfect, a wonderful and sweet moment that she's so grateful they get to share.]

Do you have your things packed and ready to go?

[She doesn't have anything she can bring, so it's really just whatever he wants to grab that's keeping them there. The thought of getting to be on the road with him is exciting, and even if she isn't back to 100% yet, she knows she will be soon. She just needs a little time.]

[ Being out of the shower makes him feel a little less exposed, a little more sure of himself. It's just so intimate, a place where he feels like his heart is laid bare, and he finds he can take a cool breath of relief once the steam subsides He's been so worried about her, he hasn't taken a moment to think about how he feels, and this serves as a welcomed reprise. Whatever comes after tonight, she'll be close to him, held in his heart. ]

You're not gonna lose me.

[ That much he can be sure of, because it would take both heaven and earth to pull her out of his arms now. He'll do anything for her, anything to keep her here, both in his arms and on this earth. Whatever it takes. ]

I still need to pack, but it won't take me long.

[ All he needs is to tuff some clothes into a bag. The government hush money is more than he ever thought he would see in his life. He could leave right now, completely naked, and would still be alright. He just wants to be with her, no questions, no doubts. Chrissy is all he needs. ]

[She smiles a little and nods in understanding. As he ushers her out of the bathroom and into his room, she stands off to the side and watches him. There's magazines on the floor by his dresser that she helpfully picks up, and tucks them into his bag for him. While he's getting clothes, he contents herself with feeling helpful. She grabs anything out in open reach and puts it into his bags for him. There's a half used bottle of cologne, a couple of belts, a half eaten candy bar, bottle of lotion, and a box of condoms that all get slipped inside.

Whether he notices she isn't sure. But he finishes up and gets her to sit on the bed so he can help her get some socks and shoes on. They're her bloodied and gross white sneakers, but they're at least something. He promises to get her new things when they get somewhere safe. That makes her smile, and she follows along after him as he starts to move things out to his van. Getting out of here fast is the priority, and she can understand that much.]

We can drive for a few hours and find somewhere to pull off the road.

[She sounds more like her old self as he helps her into the passenger seat. It's hard to imagine what it must be like to willingly give up everything. Her situation is a little different. She was killed, she had no choice. But Eddie does. He's doing all of this for her. Her heart swells when she thinks of how much he must love her.]

Are you sure you're ready to do this?

[ In the flurry of him moving around the room, Eddie doesn't notice any of the things she's tucked into his bag. Those will all be pleasant surprises for later. He tries to make sure to pack things that will suit her in the interim, shirts and pants that he's already grown out of. Once they've gotten themselves far from Hawkins, when they feel like they can breathe again, he'll take her out shopping, but her whatever she wants. Eddie zips up the bag with a bit of effort, having to press the sides together to get it closed. ]

I've been ready for a long time.

[ He says it almost without thinking, because that's-- well, that's a heavy sort of thing to say to her. But it's true, it had first passed through his mind when they had met in the woods. Eddie had seen how she was hurting, and had only wanted to whisk her up and get her away from everything. He can do that now, with their circumstances so drastically changed. ]

Oh, one more thing. [ Eddie strides back over to his closet, fishing out a comfortable hooded sweatshirt in a deep maroon, a Black Sabbath design splayed across the front. He's smiling as he returns to her, helps her into it, pulling the soft fabric over her head. ] It's cold out there.

[ And that's it, really. His life is backed up into one small duffel bag, and he's ready to run away with the previously dead girl of his dreams. He wishes things could be different, but she's here with him now, and that counts for a lot. ]

You ready?

[The sound she makes is more akin to a hum than an actual answer. Humaning is hard, and her ability to be one comes and goes. But she sounds positive and like she's ready, so she reaches over to grab his hand as she nods.]

Ready.

[Neither of them even look back as they leave. There's nothing else for them here. All they have to do is look forward to what's waiting ahead. Which, as it turns out, is a lot of open road. Eddie stops at a gas station about an hour in so they can grab a snack and she can use the bathroom. She doesn't lock the door and he winds up having to come in when she takes too long without answering him.

He finds her staring at herself in the mirror at the sink, almost puzzled by her appearance. She lost track of herself and time itself staring at her own reflection, trying to make sure that the eyes looking back at her are her own. There's a fear she came back wrong, or this isn't her body. But everything feels like hers, and she's pretty sure Eddie is now concerned she's defective.

So she apologizes repeatedly on their way back out to the car, and winds up eating half a bag of chips because she doesn't want to ever make Eddie worry more about her than he already does. If she has it her way, he'll never be sad again.]

How many days do you think it will take us to get to the beach?

[She pipes up over the tape he has quietly playing, once again sounding like her old self. It seems to be coming and going tonight, but she keeps telling herself that's normal.]

[ Honestly, Eddie wishes she didn't feel the need to apologize. He knows he could ask her, tell her to stop, and she might oblige but-- well, there's a lot the both of them, but especially her, need to work through. He can't even begin to wrap his head around how it must feel to be dead and then suddenly not, to have to watch someone else bleed out and then help stitch them back togheter. So eddie lets her apologize, say whatever she needs to, answering with a few soft "it's alright"s when he can.

Primarily, he's just focused on driving, and with every mile they put behind them he feels a little more relaxed, a little more free. They can leave everything dark and terrible back in Hawkins, and let the rest of the world be bright. It's getting into the late hours of the morning when he finally pulls off the road, feeling the heat of exhaustion creeping in behind his eyeballs.

The hotel he chooses is nice, not over the top extravagant but certainly better than some shabby roadside motel. Eddie lets her wait in the car while he goes inside to book them a room. He returns twenty or so minutes later, ushers her quickly inside through the lobby and into the elevator. They take the quiet ride upwards, and after a short trip down a carpeted hallway he gets them into their room. It's clean, comfortable, with a large bed and the biggest tv he's seen set up across from it. ]

Bet you're tired. [ He says with a small smile as he nudged her towards the bed. ] You mind if we share?

[She laughs as she shakes her head, reaching up to grab hold of his shoulders so she can pull him back toward the bed with her. His arms wrap around her and they wind up stumbling their way to fall into bed together. It's so soft that it takes her by surprise, and she gasps as she clings hold of him a little tighter than necessary.

When they don't sink into the blankets, she relents her grip, instead choosing to steal a kiss or two. He thinks that she must be tired, and even though she's feeling out of sorts, the last thing she wants to do is sleep. She's terrified that if she closes her eyes, she'll never open them again. The thought of going back to restless darkness is enough to make her never want to sleep again. But if he's brought her back and she's human now, it means she'll have to eventually. ]

You should try sleeping. I'll be right here.

[ After the night they've had, Eddie is more than ready to kick off his shoes and curl up beneath the blankets. In the morning they can order room service, then hit the road and keep making their way across the country. But even as Chrissy leans in for a kiss, he can sense something is off. The whole thing is off, obviously, but she certainly doesn't seem in the mood to relax. Eddie reaches to wrap his arms around her, presses the palm of his hand against her back and lets it move in slow circles. ]

I can stay up with you.

[ For as long as he can keep his eyes open, at least. But he hates the idea of her sitting alone in the dark, anxious and unable to sleep. It's his fault she feels this way, if he had just let her rest then-- he has to force that train of thought to stop. He'll drive himself crazy this way, and he wants them to be able to figure out the way forward. ]

We could watch a movie or something. Are you hungry?

[Is she hungry? Chrissy blinks as she presses a hand against her stomach. It's the first time she's stopped to think about bodily functions, and she realizes that she actually feels...incredibly full. So she frowns and shakes her head, as memories of being alive and having a complicated relationship with food fill her mind. This isn't how it was back then though. This is a different kind of fullness, one that almost borders on discomfort.]

Not really, but —

[Pausing, her hands press harder against her stomach. Which turns out to be the wrong move, because pain instantly sets in and she grimaces. A kiss is pressed to his nose to try and distract him, as she squirms her way out from his hold to crawl off of the bed. She hurries to the bathroom, lifting up the shirt and hoodie he's put her into. And she turns, looking at her reflection in the mirror. Her stomach...definitely looks a little full and rounded.

Chrissy frowns at the sight and presses her palm as hard as she can against the area. Nausea bubbles up, and she doubles over to lean above the sink as she feels the familiar sensation of vomiting settle in. Only instead of food, what comes up is rough and gritty and suffocating. She nearly chokes on the taste of soil as it forcibly is ejected from her body, spilling up from her stomach and out her mouth. It lands in the sink in muddy clumps that look like bloody coffee grounds. But with the smell of it, there's no mistaking that it's soil.

She tries crying out for Eddie in a panic, but her mouth and throat are too full to make anything but muffled noise. It just keeps coming and coming, and her hands grip hold of the edge of the counter as she tries to just get through it.]

Chrissy?

[ Eddie sits stunned for a moment, blinks stupidly as he watches her rush towards the bathroom. It's the sound of vomiting that gets him up and off his feet, rushing after her into the bathroom. He thinks he's ready for what he's going to see when he flings open the door, but there's nothing that could have prepared him for this. His eyes go wide, flicking between the dirt in the sink and Chrissy, hunched over and vomiting. Oh fuck. Oh fuck.

He says nothing as he grabs the small trashcan in the bathroom, holding it beneath Chrissy as she continues to vomit up dirt. Eddie helps ease her to the floor, keeps one arm wrapped around her shoulders. The sight is enough to make his own stomach turn, the gas station snacks threatening to make their own reappearance. But he swallows hard, fights to keep his composure. ]

You're okay, I've got you. [ He says softly. She might not even hear him over her own retching. It seems like an eternity has passed when she finally goes still, when the dry heaving turns into a hoarse coughing. Eddie doesn't even know what to say, his face gone pale. ] I'm so sorry. This is all my fault.

I'm sorry. [Her voice is rough, and she leans up against him with a soft groan. It feels like that had lasted forever, and now she's too exhausted to put up a fight about sleeping. There's still the fear of her closing her eyes and never waking up again, but it's pretty obvious now that she didn't come back right.

Or maybe she had, and this is just the way things are.]

I know you wanted me to be the same as I used to be, but I think I'm defective or something. I came back all wrong.

[She won't blame him if he doesn't ever want to kiss or touch her again.]

You don't have to apologize.

[ Eddie turns his head to press a kiss into Chrissy's hair. She's only going through all of this because of him, so if anything, he's the one that owes apology after apology. Once he's sure she's finished, Eddie stands, goes to the counter and fumbles with a cup wrapped in plastic. He fills it with water, carefully avoiding the dirt that fills the sink, before returning to sit beside her. Eddie lifts it to her lips, carefully helps her drink. ]

You came back perfect. [ He says softly once she's finished, brushing her bangs from her eyes. ] And maybe... well, maybe we can find someone who knows about this kind of stuff. The bringing the dead back to life stuff, I mean. There have to be people out there who-- who know about this kind of thing. That can work out the kinks.

I don't want you to feel guilty for saving me.

[She whispers, before greedily drinking as much water as she can. She's absolutely parched, and it doesn't feel like there's enough water in the world to make her feel hydrated. But he's helping her drink, and he's doing a good job of comforting her. The idea that there's people out there that can help them gives her hope. Even if she's wrong now, she doesn't always have to be.

Eventually, she'll be good enough for him. She'll be someone worthy of a guy as devoted and good as he is.]

Maybe after the beach, we can try finding them. I really want to see the ocean.

Sure, beach first, spooky witches later.

[ He's trying to lighten the mood, but that's sort of of tough to do when his now girlfriend has just been vomiting up dirt. Chrissy seems a little better once she's gotten all out of her system and had some water. He helps her up off the floor, keeps a close hold her as he guides her back towards the bed. Eddie smiles as he helps her into bed, leans down to kiss her as he tucks the blankets around her. ]

I'll be right back.

[ He returns to the bathroom, tired as he is, to clean up the mess she's left behind. It's strange, because it's all dirt and soil, no actual vomit or stomach bile. At least that makes it easy to clean up. He scoops all the dirt he can into the trashcan, washing the last dregs of soil down the drain. Eddie takes a few extra minutes to scrub his hands clean before he returns. He kicks out of his jeans, leaves everything else where it is before crawling into bed beside her. ]

You feeling okay now?

[In the time that he's gone, she strips out of the hoodie and everything else, and is just left in the t-shirt he's given her. She finds it amusing that she's wearing his old boxers, and makes a mental note that they need to go shopping sooner rather than later to get her some things. But there's not an underlying urgency to it. In fact, when she clutches his hoodie close to her chest and dips her head down to sniff at it, the smell of him is so overwhelmingly comforting that she almost wants to roll all over it so his scent is on her too.

It's such a primal and almost animalistic thought that shame floods her, and she carefully tucks the hoodie away on a nearby chair so she won't be tempted further. She keeps glancing over at it though, and finding that she's anxious because he's not right there with her. Hearing the water running, she figures he's cleaning up. He doesn't keep her waiting for long though, and soon he's joining her in bed.]

I'm feeling better, yeah. [Which is the honest truth, and she snuggles in close to rest her head on his chest. Her ear is pressed against his heart, and the sound of his heart steadily beating comforts her further.]

Are you sure you don't think I'm weird or gross or anything?

No, you're not weird or gross.

[ Because yeah, her throwing up dirt is definitely both weird and gross, but that doesn't mean she is. All he wants right now is to make her comfortable, no matter what has just happened. Instead he pulls her close, holds her and breathe in the scent of her. There's the distinctive scent of girl, shampoo and lotion, but also fresh turned earth. And if he's being honest, he likes the smell, finds it just as pleasant as the rest of her. ]

I know... I know all of this is weird. [ Weird doesn't even begin to cover it, but it's a good verbal bandage for now. And really, he doesn't care. He doesn't care if she throws up dirt, or bugs, or snails. He loves her, so deeply. ] But I'm here with you, through all of this. Whatever happens.

[She hums in contentment, her hand slipping beneath his shirt to press against his stomach. Rubbing her palm in small circles, she smiles sleepily at the feel of him. It almost puts her in a trance, and she's quiet for a while as she just enjoys cuddling with him.]

I love you, Eddie. So much.

[She's unaware of the fact that his bringing her back has created a tether between them, a string of fate that binds them together. She cares about him on her own, of course, but his act of resurrecting her has amplified her feelings into something that feels like it might consume her. And with her head against his heart and her hand against his stomach, she feels so connected to him that she's genuinely happy.

There's ways to be closer to him, she knows. But isn't sure it's right of her to try for that when she was just throwing up dirt.]

And if you don't think I'm weird or gross, then maybe sometime can we...

[She hesitates, some of her girlish shyness from her previous life slipping back in.]

You know. Be closer?

I love you too, Chrissy. More than anything.

[ That much he can say with confidence. There is no one on Earth he would have gone through all of this for but her. Sure it's strange, usual, a blatant defiance of the laws of nature-- but for her, Eddie could give less than a single fuck about all of that. She's alive now, and they'll figure out together how to make that as painless as possible. ]

Oh? [ He needs a moment them because yes, that is the natural conclusion of things. And he's thought about it before now, before anything weird and twisted have ever plagued the two of them. ] Yeah, I-- I really want that, Chrissy.

[ And he feels a little bit embarrassed, because even though he's just seen her spewing up dirt, he would still be more than willing to-- well. But he knows he needs to give her time, that she's going through so much more than he could ever understand. ]

How about we sleep now? It's been a long night. And in the morning, if you want, I'd love to... be closer.

Yeah, okay.

[She agrees, managing a soft yawn. Her hand doesn't move from his stomach, enjoying the feeling of his warm skin against her too much. It doesn't take long before she's lulled to sleep by the sound of his heartbeat, Chrissy's body needing some time to recover from the day's events. Her dreams are gentle and sweet, no nightmares to haunt her.

She's peaceful enough that she sleeps well into the next morning, unaware that she's shifted to practically lay on top of him in an attempt to seek out body heat to stay warm. Both of her hands have wedged up beneath his shirt, and it's pushed up far enough that her cheek is resting against bare skin. Even with as tiny as she is, she's a dead weight as she sleeps.

Stirring when he begins to move, she blearily blinks awake and lifts her head to look down at him.]

Eddie. [She whispers his name, nuzzling and nudging her way to press her face against the curve of his neck. Inhaling the scent of him makes her shiver a little, and she's smiling as she peppers his face with kisses. After resting, she feels a lot more like herself. It still feels like she can't seem to get close enough to him, but this is good. It's warm and she's happy, and she really can't ask for more than that.]

Eddie, wake up. Sunlight is coming through the curtains.

[ Eddie wants to stay up and make sure she falls asleep, but he's out almost the moment his head hits the pillow. Exhausted doesn't even begin to cover it, after the night they've had. His dreams are blissfully peaceful, calm and tranquil. It's nothing that lingers long in his memory as he stirs awake. In the first few minutes, he can even forget just how they got here, why she's even here at all. He can just-- exist with her. ]

Hm? [ Her words take a moment to sink into his groggy brain. He yawns, stretching a little beneath her but making no move to pull her off. He quite likes this morning affection. ] Morning already?

How're you feeling?

[The question seems to throw her off. Not because she isn't expecting him to ask, but because she feels fine. Everything from the night before is just a distant memory now, and almost feels fuzzy enough that she's convinced herself that maybe it isn't even real. There's no way she was doubled over in pain, throwing up dirt.

Not a chance it could happen.]

I feel... [She hesitates in answering him right away though, wanting to make sure it's the right answer. It's not like Eddie would put her to the test just to see what she says, he genuinely wants to know. There is no wrong answer here. So she just smiles and shrugs, deciding more affection and cuddling is the way to go here.]

I feel warm when we lay like this. Happy.

[She pauses, her kisses working along his jawline and down his neck.]

I feel better after sleeping.

[The words are whispered against his skin, her breath hot against him.]

[ For a moment, Eddie is concerned. He thinks she might tell him she's had nightmares, or that she feels disconnected to the real world but-- she's fine. She's feeling alright. Warm. Happy. Better. And she's also kissing him, pressing herself close, and yeah, that's pretty nice too. It makes his heart ache in the best possible way, makes him want to add several more days to their hotel stay. If they really wanted, they could ignore the real world and stay like this forever. ]

That's great, Chrissy.

[ There's so much heart in his response, makes every inch of him feel nothing but delighted. She just looks so... so happy, so at peace, and for however long this might last, he wants to take full of advantage. So Eddie gets himself awake in a hurry, stretches so he can find her lips with his own. He kisses her in the hungry, desperate way he's been wanting to, pulling her as close as he can manage. ]

You know... [ He pulls back for breath and to speak, looking a little shy, and a little sly. ] We don't have to get back on the road today.

[That look on his face makes her laugh, and she nuzzles her face in close against his neck once again. She can't get enough of how warm he is. It's like he's able to make her feel warm and human. She's addicted to the feel of him against her.]

You did say we could be closer today if I still wanted to.

[She reminds him, teeth grazing against his skin as she shifts to sit up a little and peer down at him. The look on her face is one of pure love. He's done everything in his power to bring her back, and she's only here right now because of him.]

Are you sure you want to, though? I mean, I was throwing up dirt last night.

[She pauses, face contorting into confusion as she tries to remember if that was real or not.]

Right?

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