cheerfire | whoever fights monsters

whoever fights monsters

[ Eddie had thought about death before. Plenty of times. But it had never been in any real sort of way. It had been miniatures on a table top, heroic characters meeting tragic ends. It had been Boromir sent down the river, Artax in the swamp of sadness. They were always devastating, always epic-- always fictional. Because he was young, because for most of his life monsters were only things in stories, Eddie had never really thought about his own death. He was young, and still possessed a certain feeling of being invincible.

Things had changed so quickly, his entire understanding of reality crashing down around him. For the first time, he felt truly afraid to die. He saw heroism existing outside of stories, and had wanted to be like that too, no matter how afraid he was, no matter how much Hawkins hated him. He was going to be brave, in a way that made a difference, he wouldn't run away.

And he died for it.

There was nothing that could have prepared him for it, the feeling of being torn apart. Sometimes, he thinks he's still screaming. Everything was dark around the edges, time seeming to slow as he shared his final words with Dustin. Then he was gone. Or perhaps, not gone, but... elsewhere. Somewhere dark and infinite. If this was hell, maybe he's lucked out. There's no fire, no winged assholes with pitchforks. Just nothing, reaching out in all directions.

It was in the darkness that he heard it. Something had called out to him, and Eddie had answered. He can't quite remember it, the way he was remade. It had hurt, had felt like hellfire burning through him. Eddie was acutely aware of how every inch of him was stitched back together. The same, and yet so impossibly different. He was still Eddie, in some small way. But he was also something else.

Eddie hits the ground running, literally, thrown from the void and back into the town that despises him. He's hungry, so hungry, the feeling overwhelms him. He can't think about anything else until he finds someone, a man wandering down one of the devastated streets. Eddie overpowers him easily, and takes what he needs. It's as he's wiping the blood from his mouth that an order strikes through him, straight from the lips of his creator.

Eddie is a general now. And he needs recruits.

A name flits across his mind, and Eddie smiles to himself. Someone he knows-- knew, once. Eddie takes a moment to make himself presentable. Rather, to make it look like he hasn't just killed someone. He looks like he's been through hell, and that's true enough, but he doesn't head out until the only blood on him is his own. He's quick and quiet in a way he never was before, and he's in front of the darkened house before he knows it. It looks almost deserted. Maybe her parents are out of town. Maybe they're dead. It doesn't matter

Perfect.

He does a lap around the house, trying to determine which window might be Chrissy's. He makes his best guess, and sends a perfectly aimed pebble up into the darkness. ]

Hey! Chrissy! [ It's eerie, how much his voice still sounds like his own. ] You up there?

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[Things have been hard since their last stand against Vecna. Eddie's death had been traumatic, and she hadn't been able to get to him when he was dying because of the bats. It was only after he passed in Dustin's arms that she was able to run her way to him. Steve had to physically pry her away from him and drag her back through the gate to Hawkins.

Like so many others during the "earthquake", her family is gone. She thinks they likely fell through one of the cracks that had formed. It's Steve again that takes her under his wing, knowing how much both her family and Eddie had meant to her. Whatever she and Eddie had was new enough they didn't have a label for it. But it had been good, and she knows she cared about him.

But given that he's the one everyone is blaming for what happened here, and the fact they still think he's the one that killed those people...

There's no funeral. No way to mourn him the way she needs to. But Steve keeps her busy in those first days, having her go with him to hang with the others, getting her to help out at the Red Cross emergency center that's been set up at school. She spends days helping Robin make sandwiches and get food into everyone's stomachs. And in some way, she finds hope through the fact that Hawkins really seems to have come together.

But most nights, she goes back to her empty house that's too big and depressing for her to exist in alone. But she knows that she doesn't have any other choice right now, because there's nowhere else for her to go. It's hard to imagine what a future for anyone in this town looks like, particularly her, orphaned a few months before she turns 18 and stuck in the town that's villainizing the guy she hadn't been able to protect.

In a lot of ways, it feels like she should be doing a better job of protecting the memory of him. So she seeks out his uncle and cries in his arms. She makes sure he has food and companionship, and she makes sure he knows that someone in this godforsaken town loved Eddie Munson. She's just gotten back in from dinner with Wayne when she hears the sound of someone outside the house.

Thinking it's probably someone that could mean her harm, she grabs her dead brother's baseball bat and sneaks her way outside. She climbs and hops over the wooden fence, her strength and agility now vastly improved. And she has the bat raised and at the ready to swing when she rounds around the side of the house.

Nothing prepares her for who she sees standing there. The bat drops to the ground, the dull thud of it alerting him of her presence outside with him.]

Eddie?

[Her voice is barely a squeak.

Will had said this wasn't the end with Vecna. Maybe this is how he comes back. Haunting her with visions of Eddie instead of the sounds of her mother yelling about how fat she is. It seems like a far more cruel thing to do. And yet, she still takes a cautious step in closer, feeling drawn in toward him. She wants this to really be Eddie so badly that it hurts.

Her foot still steps on the end of the bat handle, making it rise up enough that she can grab it and toss it in the air, catching it by the handle. It's pointed out toward him, almost defensively.]

Prove it's you.

[Please be you, her eyes seem to beg.]

[ He can hear her sneaking out of the house, tracks every quiet footstep as she approaches. Of course, he shouldn't be able to hear any of that at all, and so he remains peering up into the darkness. When he hears his name he acts appropriately started, wheels around on the spot with wide eyes and his hands held open palmed in front of him. There's a bit of genuine surprise mixed in, something he hadn't expected, because hearing her say his name had sent something shooting through him. ]

Uptown Girl! [ He sputters out, remaining frozen in place. As though she could take him on with a bat. As though anyone could do much to him with how he is right now. ] The first song I played for you. It was Uptown Girl.

[ And then he smiles, timid as he shifts his weight from foot to foot. ]

[The bat is dropped for a second time as he tells her about the first song he played for her, though this time it's intentional. It's dropped and forgotten as she runs over to him. Chrissy practically leaps to tackle him in a hug, clinging hold of him with a fear of letting him go.]

How is this even possible?

[He was dead, she had sobbed over his body. Steve had pried her off of him, made her leave him there. And now he's here, acting shy and boyish, like he's just dropping by to take her out on a date. It's completely surreal, and she thinks that maybe she's really gone and lost her mind. But it doesn't matter, because he feels solid and real in her arms.]

[ Eddie has no problem opening his arms to her, catching her in the hug and holding her tightly. Something deep within him practically screams, a warning that wants to explode out of him. Run, go, it's not me. But it is him, and isn't that the problem. He can give her any answer she wants and pass with flying colors. ]

I don't know.

[ Even with his intentions being so corrupt, he finds himself enjoying the feeling of her body pressed against his. She's perfect, which is why he's here in the first place. ]

I was-- I fucking died. And then I woke up here and-- [ He looks so convincing as he recounts the tale, wears fear and confusion on his face. ] So I came here.

[The fact that he woke up and then came here first makes her heart ache and race at the same time. She slides back down to stand on her own feet, concern on her face as she tries to look him over without making a fuss.]

It's okay, Eddie. Whatever happened, you're here now.

[And she'll take care of him. She'll do whatever it takes to help him.]

Do you...want to come in? My family's gone after the earthquake —

[She pauses, knowing good and well it wasn't an earthquake. But it's easier to just call it one.]

So it would be quiet. And no one would be able to watch us.

[Which is a good thing, since 99% of Hawkins think Eddie's somehow responsible for the deaths of the other kids from school, as well as the earthquake itself. Satanic rituals or some bullshit. It makes Chrissy roll her eyes. But she's aware the neighbors that have stayed behind are probably going to take notice of Eddie Munson out in her front yard.]

[ He hadn't known about her parents, but it suits him perfectly. The tiny corner of his heart that is still Eddie Munson the boy breaks at the news, but it's delightfully easy to ignore. His lips press into a thin line, as though he isn't sure what to make of the news. ]

I'm so sorry, Chrissy.

[ His voice is soft as he reaches to take one of her hands in his, tugging them towards the front yard, the door. They go inside and everything is eerily still. It feels like walking into a haunted house. ]

I feel awful. [ He's frowning as he watches her in the darkness, observing every detail of her face, imagines what she could become. ] I wasn't here for you.

You know, you were dead. You couldn't be here with me.

[Besides, she thinks. This time since coming back has given her a chance to become stronger. More independent. The same sweet and innocent girl he knows is still there. But she's been hardened a little by recent events, forced into a position of loneliness and sadness. It all seems like it might be easier to handle with him back again.

She leads him through the house, and upstairs to her room. There's no one here to tell them no, no one here to stop them. It's eerily dark and quiet, but she lights her desk lamp to try and brighten the atmosphere for him a little. Figuring that he'll join her if he wants to, she goes over to sit on the edge of her bed and watches him.]

I'm really glad that you're here, Eddie. Steve's been trying to keep me company but...it's been hard. I guess I've been lonely.

But I should have been.

[ It's so easy to pretend, to say what will hit all the right buttons. Because he isn't just some copy made to look and sound like a boy, but the real thing, real written. He's not quite sure yet to his true plan of attack. Chrissy is not the same wilting flower she had been when they first met in the woods, lifetimes ago. ]

But I guess all that matters is I'm here now.

[ Eddie crosses the room towards her, puts a hand gently to the side of her face. She might notice that his fingers seem just a touch too cold against her skin. Or she might not. ]

Got somewhere I can get cleaned up?

[ He's still a mess of dirt and dried blood. There might even still be some blood of the man he had killed beneath his fingernails, the ones that now brush ever so sweetly against her cheek. ]

[She notices the slight chill to his touch, but figures it's an upside down thing. It feels wrong to question him on it right now, almost cruel somehow. So she's grateful for the distraction that his question offers her, and she bites at the inside of her cheek before nodding.]

Bathroom is down the hall, second door on your right.

[There's a second where she almost offers to go find something for him to wear, but the thought of going into her parents' room and digging through her dad's things is horrific to her. She just can't bring herself to do it. In fact, it makes her glance away from Eddie, her teeth worrying at her bottom lip as she tries to act like everything's absolutely fine.]

Do you need me to get you anything? I don't mind.

[Not for him, anyway. She'll go through the effort to get him whatever he needs.]

[ He lingers in the doorway, half out into the hall, before he turns back towards her. As if he can read her mind, Eddie gives a pitiful little smile in her direction. ]

Think you could find me something to wear?

[ It's asked almost shyly, tugging nervously at his dirty shirt as though not wanting to bother her by asking. But he wonders where she would go, her dead brother's room? Or her dead father's? Which would hurt her worse? ]

But, uh, I can try just cleaning these in the sink if that's too much.

[Her eyes widen as she gulps, and very slowly nods. The thought of getting him clothes that belong to either her brother or her father is too much for her to handle. But she's not going to just leave him with filthy things.]

Yeah, of course.

[The smile on her face is fake, meant to hide her discomfort. If he's asking for something to wear, he must really need it. Eddie doesn't just ask for things.]

You go get cleaned up. I'll find you something, okay?

[Slowly, her smile becomes more warm and genuine. And she waves him off, waiting until he's in the bathroom and she hears the water running before she hurries over to dive into her closet. Jason had given her a couple of his football tees a long time ago, and they'll fit Eddie.

It takes some digging, but she eventually finds one tucked into a box at the back of her closet. She pulls it out and does a little victory dance, before realizing that Eddie needs more than just a shirt.

Her enthusiasm and energy gone with that realization, she slowly trudges her way into her brother's bedroom. He was only thirteen, but maybe his things would work. She grabs a pair of boxers and sweatpants from his dresser without looking at anything else. And then, as she feels herself start to panic and breathe heavier, she bolts.

Chrissy runs until she nearly hits the bathroom door. Her hand bangs against it, skin crawling as she tries to fight the urge to panic.]

Eddie? [She hits at the door again, voice thick with emotion.]

Eddie, I got you things. Could you let me in?

[ It's no exaggeration that Eddie needs a shower. As soon as he's locked himself in the bathroom, he's quick to strip out of his filthy clothes and leave them in a pile in a corner. He turns the shower as hot as it will go, doesn't even flinch when he steps under the spray. The water gathers in a brackish brown at his feet before slowly swirling down the drain.

Eddie hums happily to himself as he works shampoo through his hair, as though without a care in the world. And that's true, more or less. Wearing Chrissy down should be easy enough, he's already thrown the first stone. He's considering what he might do next when he hears her knock. ]

Just a sec!

[ Eddie calls out over the sound of the shower, reaching to turn the water off and step out. He grabs one of the towels and slings it purposefully low around his hips. When he opens the door he pulls it back wide, stands there as steam seeps out around him. ]

Hey. [ He sounds a little breathless, as if he's been caught unaware instead of knowing exactly how he looks. ] Thanks, Chrissy. You're a lifesaver.

[Chrissy's caught staring at him, and feels her cheeks turn a darker and darker shade of red. By the time she realizes she's staring, it's too late. It's obvious she's just been checking him out. Chrissy practically throws the clothes at him before she takes off back to her rom in a run.

Her heart is racing, and she closes the door so she can have a moment of privacy. This isn't how things should be going at all, she thinks, as she slides down the wall to sit on the floor. Both of her hands cradle her head, and she tries not to cry. Here she is, having filthy thoughts about what's beneath the towel, remembering how they used to fool around.

And her parents and brother are dead, and even Eddie himself is going through a lot. She's a terrible person. Really, she's just the worst.]

[ Eddie smiles wickedly to himself as she shoots down the hall, closing the door to shut himself back in the bathroom. He looks himself over carefully, making sure nothing is amiss. He skims his fingers over his chest, prodding at the wounds he had gained in the moments before his death. They've all closed shut, but he doesn't worry about having to explain that. Everything can be explained away by the mysteries of the Upside Down.

After he's dried off, he looks over the clothes she's given him. The shirt strikes him as something that once belonged to Jason, and he wrinkles his nose, wondering if she somehow managed to dig up things only from her room. Then he looks over the sweats and realizes they must have belonged to her brother. Good.

The sweats are a little short on him, but otherwise fit alright. Besides, he wants to be wearing them. Eddie pads quietly down the hall, peaks his head into the room to find her sitting on the floor. ]

Chrissy? [ He moves to crouch down beside her, puts an arm carefully around her shoulders. ] Hey, are you okay?

Don't worry about me.

[She insists, trying to fake a smile. Because she can't tell him that she's upset because her family is dead, and she's had to just go into her brother's room to get him clothes. It doesn't touch base on the fact that she's upset because she's wishing they can just go back to the way things were between them.

His arm is around her now though, and she can take some comfort from that. Slowly, she shifts so she's leaning up against him.]

This is all just a lot to deal with. I went from mourning you by myself to having you back again.

[And that's not even touching on the loss of her family and the destruction of Hawkins.]

[ Regardless of his motives, or what he's trying to do to her, it feels nice to have her lean against him. Eddie thinks that must be some remnant of his old self, but he doesn't bother to fight the feeling down. She's as beautiful as she ever was, maybe even a little more so, on the verge of breaking down. ]

I'm sorry. [ His voice is in her ear, low and sweet. ] Do you... need some space, maybe? This must be a lot all at once.

No.

[She's quick to answer that, reaching over to grab at him like he's her lifeline.]

I don't want you to go.

[It doesn't matter that she sounds soft and pathetic as she says it, or that she's holding onto him as tight as she can, her fingernails almost biting into his skin with the grip she has on his arm.]

Stay. Please.

Of course, Chrissy. Of course.

[ He turns into her, so he can wrap both his arms around her in a tight embrace. Eddie smiles to himself as he buries his face against her shoulder, lets the moment linger before he eases them both back onto their feet. ]

If you want, I-- I mean... [ Eddie trails off, looking perfectly bashful as he nods his head in the direction of her bed. ] I could sleep here with you?

[ There are a lot of ways this could go, almost of them working in his favor. Eddie lets a hand trail up and down her back, rubbing slow, soothing lines against her. ]

[It's not like he hasn't been in her bed before. He used to sneak in her window before everything went to hell. But this is different somehow, in a heartbreaking kind of wa. They're not the same people they were back then.

And the thought of sleeping in bed with him is far less about sex and arousal, and more about finding comfort and simply not being alone. She nods in response, and he guides her toward her bed, ushering her to lay down.

It isn't until they're curled up together, Chrissy's hand running up and down along his arm that she's able to relax enough that she remembers to breathe.]

I've missed you, Eddie.

[Her voice almost sounds absent as she says it, like she can't bring herself to connect emotion to the words out of a fear none of this is even real.]

I missed you too.

[ And that isn't a lie, isn't something he has to summon up to deceive her. It's just different now, the way he wants her. What he wants from her. Eddie almost feels human as he lies in bed with her, limbs tangled together as moonlight streams in through the window. ]

When I was... when I was dying, I was thinking about you.

[ That's true as well, though now he brings it up with the intention of prodding at emotional wounds. He lets his fingers drift slowly through her hair, wraps strands of sweet strawberry blonde around her. ]

It was awful. The feeling-- the pain-- fuck, I'll never forget it. Every inch of me being torn apart. And all I could think about was you. Like I failed you.

[Hearing that makes her heart shatter. Chrissy tries to hold in her emotion, to not let him know how broken she currently is. She had thought that having him back might fix things. Might make her feel reasonably whole again. But there's something off about this, something she can't put her finger on. Eddie doesn't make everything feel better. He only complicates her feelings of loss and guilt, makes her realize just how messed up everything here in Hawkins is.

A sob wracks her small frame, and she cries in his arms.]

I'm sorry I wasn't there when you needed me.

[She wasn't there for him, or her family. It's not her fault that they all died, but it is her fault she can't ever seem to be in the right place at the right time for the people she loves.]

No, come on, there's nothing to apologize for.

[ He doesn't hesitate to wrap her up in his arms as she cries. It's easier to have her like this, where she can't see the indifferent look on his face. As far as she can tell, he's doing everything right, keeping her close and trying to offer comfort. Of course, his comfort is tinged with malice, the desire to keep her twisted and lost. ]

There was nothing you could have done. You were-- you never could have saved me.

[ Eddie makes himself shudder against her, as though angst is rising up within him. He makes a week attempt at walking it back, not really meant to make her feel better. ]

No one could have, I mean. I was a goner.

[He couldn't mean it the way it sounds. At least, that's what she tells herself as he only makes her cry harder. There's nothing to apologize for, but he's right. there's nothing she could've done to save him. She's weak, the one that's always in need of protection.

Chrissy can only cling hold of him tighter as she feels him shudder, and cries until her eyes are burning and she feels like there's nothing left she can possibly cry about.]

I told Steve to leave me there with you.

[But obviously, he hadn't. And he wouldn't, Steve Harrington would never leave an innocent girl alone in the Upside Down with the corpse of the guy she had been in a thing with. She's pretty sure if Steve were here right now, actually, she'd probably have a thing or two to say to her just sobbing all over Eddie after he's come back.

God, she's so weak and pathetic.

And she has no idea why Eddie's being so calm about all of this, when she can't even hold herself together. There's something off about it, but she can't figure out how.]

[ Eddie remains quiet for a moment, lets her cry against him. He holds her close and runs a hand down her back, as though to soothe. He has to be careful, he thinks, not to break her too hard, or too quickly. Tonight has been a good start, but he decides to take his foot off the gas, for now. ]

I'm sorry, Chrissy. I'm sorry you went through that.

[ He lets himself lean back into what scraps of his humanity are left, tries to channel the boy he once was. She has to need him, to rely on him, and that won't happen if he lays the angst on much further. ]

I'm here for you now, okay? I'll never leave you again.

[She nods, a lost and almost childish motion. She feels so lost and alone right now. When you're a kid, you spend all your time wishing you were in charge. That you were grown and could do whatever you wanted. Now that she's without her family and in charge of her own destiny for the most part, she's absolutely terrified. Having Eddie there to help buffer some of the trauma helps a lot.

The deafening roar of anxiety is more of a displeased buzz when his arms are around her and she knows he's alive and safe.]

Maybe we shouldn't make promises we can't keep.

[It's pointed out in a soft voice, a plea more than her telling him what to do.

But she lifts her head enough that she can kiss him, her lips grazing the corner of his mouth as she misses her target.]

Yeah... sorry.

[ He lets out a soft huff of breath, the corners of his lips turning up into an almost shy smile as she kisses him. There's a reason that he chose to come to her, more than the fact she might be easiest to manipulate. Eddie feels inexplicably drawn to her, even now, even as other as he's become. That thought floats across his mind, and he isn't quite sure what to make of it. ]

We should get some rest. [ Eddie presses light kisses against her hair, pulls her closer. There's a feeling that stirs in his stomach-- guilt, he thinks, but that can't be right. ] Tonight's been a lot for you.

[Surprisingly, she doesn't protest the fact that tonight's been a lot for her. She does want to argue that every night since he died has been a lot for her, but it feels petulant and empty. He's not her father, trying to tell her what to do. Eddie's making a suggestion because he cares about her and can tell she's worn down.

And she's so grateful that he can even be here to take charge. She shifts a little, just until she's comfortable curled up against him. And it's no time at all before she settles. She whispers that she loves him before sleep overcomes her, and for the first time in weeks she manages to stay asleep the entire night.

When she wakes up early the next morning, it's barely sunrise. There's some squirming free involved, but she slips out of his arms and makes her way into the bathroom for a shower. She emerges a little while later, dressed in athletic shorts and a sports bra, her wet hair pulled up into a high ponytail.

She's sitting on the edge of the bed to get her shoes and socks on when she feels the bed shift, followed by a press of his lips between her shoulder blades and then again on her shoulder. It's when he presses a kiss to her cheek that she grins and lifts her hand to lightly caress the side of his face.]

I was going to go out for a run. You don't have to get up now, it's super early.

[ Despite his changed state, Eddie still needs rest, requires sleep. He hears that whispered declaration, and her words curl somewhere deep inside him, in some safe, sacred place. It's not long before Eddie is also asleep, and while it is dark and dreamless, Eddie seems almost boyish as all the wickedness slips away.

He looks nearly peaceful as the morning hours wear on, even while hunger creeps into him. Eddie stirs a little when Chrissy slips out from his arms, a hushed whimper escaping him at the loss of her warmth. It's not until he feels the weight of her back in the bed that Eddie reaches out, pressing his lips to wherever he can reach. ]

Do you have to go? [ Eddie asks sleepily, both wholly himself and not at all. A hand reaches up to grasp hers, tugging gently as though to bring her back down into bed. ] It's still weird out that. I don't want anything to happen to you.

[It seems he's easy for him to convince her to do anything, because she almost instantly relents as he pulls her back toward him. She only has her socks on, and the shoe that she was putting on is forgotten, easily kicked off to join its match on the floor. She's giggling as she moves to lay back down with him, rolling over onto her side so she can sweetly kiss him.]

You just want to keep me in bed with you. Admit it.

[Not that she seems to be in the mood to protest. Instead she sighs contently, thumb lightly tracing against his jawline.]

I've gotten used to weird things happening. It doesn't bother me anymore.

Yeah, you caught me.

[ It's the closest to human Eddie has felt since his return, and he thanks that it might have something to do with his hunger. He feels weak, both like and unlike himself. For as much as he's been given, power and orders, Eddie doesn't know what to do with himself in this moment. All he can think of is that he wants Chrissy, wants to feel her body pressed close to him. It doesn't seem all that difficult to get her back into bed, and Eddie smiles as he returns the kiss. ]

I guess I just... I just got back, you know?

[ The directive that guides him is still there, but it has changed from a petulant thrumming to a faded buzz in the back of his mind. The desire to feed calls out from somewhere inside him, but he ignores it, for the moment. Instead Eddie buries his face into the crook of her neck, plants kisses there where he might otherwise bite. ]

I missed you.

[He couldn't possibly mean to guilt her. But his words make her feel a heaviness all the same, guilt tugging at her until she's left burying her hand in his hair, keeping his face against her neck so he won't see the look on her face.]

I missed you too, Eddie.

[Which is such a simple way of putting it. Of course she's missed him. She's missed him like crazy. It's hard to move on from a guy when the entire town thinks he's the devil and is responsible for all the bad things to happen in Hawkins.]

Don't worry. I'm not going anywhere. I'll stay right here with you, okay?

[There's a restless energy that she can't seem to shake. Even now, laying here with him, her leg bounces a little. But she holds him close and combs her fingers through his hair. She doesn't have to go on a jog. Not today. It can wait until he doesn't need her.]

Thanks.

[ He sounds relieved, and some part of him really feels that way. Despite his ulterior motives, he doesn't want Chrissy to be far from him. Eddie can't explain it, at least, now when he's come back different. Chrissy shouldn't matter to him in any real way, but he smoothes a hand down her jittery leg like he really means to soothe. ]

I'm sorry, I just-- [ A laugh bubbles out of him, shaky and unsure. ] I don't know. I don't want to make things worse for you.

[ For the first time, he speaks without the intention of causing guilt. It still might come across that way, but he doesn't mean it, not right now. How long this feeling will last, he isn't sure. He thinks that the sooner it's gone, the better. ]

[That laugh makes her feel like things are back to how they were before everything went to hell. Back when he was hellbent on impressing her and making her laugh, and she's pretty sure she scared the hell out of him. She made him laugh shaky and unsure like that on more than one occasion back then. Hearing it come from him now makes her smile a little. Which of course, she feels guilty for, because he sounds a little lost in the moment.]

How could you ever make things worse for me?

[She demands to know, pulling back enough to fix him with a seriously concerned look. It bothers her when he thinks so lowly of himself.]

The only thing you're doing is showing me I don't have to be alone anymore. Eddie, I —

[Pausing, she worries at her lip for a second before she lets the words tumble out of her further. She doesn't want him to worry about her, but she also doesn't want to feel like she isn't being up front and honest with him too.]

Do you have any idea how big of a deal it is to me that you're alive right now? And that you came to see me?

I don't know...

[ A lie. He knows exactly how to make things worse for her, knows that his being here at all is making things worse. Chrissy just isn't aware of that yet. Something close to guilt burrows into him, and Eddie tries to force it down. Guilt isn't supposed to be part of what he feels now, and it's an irritating distraction. ]

I guess it's just-- [ Maybe it's the hunger that's distracting him, keeping him from otherwise laser focus. He can feel it deep within him, sharp in his guts. ] I'm still trying to catch up, I think.

[ He wants to feed, but it's still a want more than a need. There's still a way to use his hunger to his benefit, and so he swallows it down. Everything will come in good time, he just needs to be patient, careful. ]

[Chrissy's quiet for a minute, and instead of saying anything right away, she simply showers Eddie with little touches and kisses. She can't say that she gets exactly what he's going through, but she knows what it feels like to fall back into Hawkins and have to catch up to a world that's totally different.]

It's okay if you take a while to catch up. I'm here to help you through it, no matter how long it takes.

[She pauses, pressing a kiss to the tip of his nose in an attempt to make him at least smile a little.]

Is there anything I can do for you now? Are you hungry? Want to go back to sleep?

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